i need a miracle

Happy Birthday aDe!

2009-04-03T04:54:00.002+08:00

Happy Birthday to myself... i really hope my wishes come true tt i just wished upon a cake frm msn.. (yes this yr on d day itself i wont be havin a cake coz im gg outstation for work)... but stil i hope those wishes of mine will come true... (as it is bday wishes.. i wldnt type them out here)
n okie im officially old old old old...
but b4 i become tt old old old... i reali hope one of my wish (tt is for myself ) wil come true...
tt's all for now...
may all my wishes come true =)

Happy Lunar New Year..

2009-02-09T11:46:00.002+08:00

Happy Lunar New Year, Happy Chinese New Year, Happy Niu Year.. Happy Ox Year.. LOL.
15th day into ox year and also the last day of chinese new year..
hope everyone is doing well...
hope the economy gets better n everyone can earn big bucks n dreamz come true..
tt is what im hoping for...
2 more mths.. or slightly less den 2 mths... want it to come badly yet dun wan it to come... arghh... life...

In lahore...

2009-01-13T06:04:00.003+08:00

rottin slackin in lahore... m seriously v bored here... i cant wait to get hm...
these few daes in lhe set me thinkin again... about life... tme reali flies huh.. im realli like 2 yrs behind tme... feelin like it is now only 07 gg 08 at most.. but actually it is alrdy 09...
seein my couz growin up.. i feel realli old... n useless... livin in this world for 20+yrs yet i still dunno what m i exactly doin in life... everydae seems aimless...
this sux... haiz... why m i still pinnin hopes?

Happy 2009!!!

2009-01-01T00:32:00.001+08:00

Happy New Year everyone.. Happy 2009...
May the year 2009 be a great year for everyone... all wishes and dreams come true =)

a mth later...

2008-12-05T20:32:00.002+08:00

been a mth since i last blogged... im realli v lazy to update... some photos that i taken frm ams but im lazy to upload either... geez...

nex stop.. pvg tmr... hope all will be good and well... and if poss i can get a nte view of the bund which is tough...given the cop...

having a self savings plan... n hope i can see the results by next yr aug.. hopefully more than i planned initially.... is good to save for rainy days...... and when will i get my wishlist cleared?

alright will try to update again when im back... well.. keyword is try......

Zurich

2008-11-03T06:58:00.008+08:00

i cant slp... losing slp n is almost 7am in the morning.. arghhh... decided to post some pics here since i cant slp... here goes... Pics frm ZRH...

tt's all for now... stil dun feel like slpin manz... arghhhhh

Hectic Lifestyle

2008-10-26T20:05:00.002+08:00

tired tired tired... into my new job... so far all i feel is tired... i feel neutral about the job itself.. but it cab b really v tiring... even tho i sort of adapt to the current lifestyle alrdy...

d sad thing is not much of personal tme now.. hmmmm.... haha probably rotting life suit me the most... ?? i dont know.......

987...

2008-10-08T20:17:00.005+08:00

omg omg omg... its official...

ended the day w some hugs n a bit of tears... i cant believe 2 and half mth is just over like that.... i still rem the 1st few days... when everyone or rather most of us are til so quiet.... till all d tails coming out...till us being the most loud, active grp....

those days r over... =(...todae officially mark the end of the phase of together-ness of 987...
frm tmr onwards... we r on our own....

987...even though most of us may not be seeing each other anytime soon due to busy roster..but but... pls pls keep in touch yea... n like wad gi said b4... rem our origin...n tt d frenship made will not just end here... 987 will always be there for everyone...

Anw... 987..i will miss u all lots lots... thx for the wonderful tmes... thx edina, yuni, fe ching, ivy, pam, serene, celina, amellda, jo, shir, jane, gil, sasa, aaron, teck, steven n kel...not forgetting mr tan thx thx thx...

"as we go on... we remember... all the tmes we had together"

i feel so proud to be part of 987!!!

987 rox!!!!!

some photos of 987...(tt can be posted)...

may we get to meet/see each other often... all the best everyone =)

What would it be like??

2008-09-14T23:11:00.001+08:00

omg... as much as i wish time can crawls a bit.. it just flies.... each yr passes by faster than the previous year...

in less than a month's time... im gg into a totally new environment... i dont dare to think about it.... i just wish that everything will be good... smooth....

at the same time...at the back of my mind.....

Tired tired tired...

2008-09-03T19:45:00.003+08:00

nvr been this tired for quite some time alrdy.. and this period of "tiredness" has been ongoing for quite sometime...

want a break... but dont think it is poss any time soon...missing sch days...

How time flies...

2008-08-18T19:01:00.006+08:00

i cant believe is been a mth.. time just flies... and today is one of the earliest day tt i rch hm...

is been a hectic and stressful wk for me last wk... but am i glad is over...

but then again.. is a kinda emo day for us today... i cant believe in less den two mths everyone of us are gg separate ways... the tot of it makes me emo again... sudd hoping time will crawl a bit...

anw... tmr we are all gg into another phase and once again i hope everything will be smooth for all of us...

some photos to update....

joyz hubby say is my weddin day.. haha so do i look like a bride??

acting cute....

from left: sherlyn, joyz,dione, sherry, me & chloe

acting taitai... n sherry babe realli look like one... lol..

from left: joyz, dione, me & sherlyn

me & val

will miss u babes lots...

Saturday...

2008-08-04T19:51:00.003+08:00

went clubbin w yi on sat... w gill n kel joining us slightly later.. n met ivy.. who is so hot... haha.. so diff in the dae n nte...

anw.. took a random pic when yi n i jus arrived at zouk... w tt 3D thingy... here it goes..

smth to add.. now at least half of d batch thinks im a frequent clubber.. hey im realli not one... jus tt of late i have been there once a wk kind.. lol...

anw.. tt nte was pretty cool... gill attract so many butterflies... haha... had to help her fend off all the butterflies manz... thx to kel too...

well well.. do hope there will be a bigger batch of us... or if poss the whole batch to come tog n bond...

so bz & tired w work of late... i miss my series badly.. lol

Help!

2008-07-29T19:18:00.004+08:00

one of the earliest day to rch hm of late... tired tired tired. mentally and physically esp the latter... i missed those days when i rot at hm... doing nth... but well... no income... n im seriously broke... w savings depleting..hitting the zero value soon..

this is a bad mth for me.. aug too... i can feel it... hoping tt frm mid aug things wil get better....

argghhhhhh......... i reali dunno wad to do next....

geeeeeeeeeeeezzzzzzzzz... save me..........

Photos...

2008-07-24T21:35:00.005+08:00

nth to blog of late.. hmm.. basically.. im really praying that things will be smoother for me.... next month...

anw.. since i have nth to blog.. m gg to post some pics again... some pics i took last mth if i din rem wrongly... hehe...

like this picture w chloe =)

that's about it for now...

Arghh

2008-07-22T02:09:00.003+08:00

in less than 3 hrs time im suppose to wake up and yet im still bloggin? y so...? im still stuck w my nails... one hand done n left w another... so tired... more of physically even tho as usual... i haven been slpin much... 2hrs + yest... and todae.. i guess oso another 2hrs or so...?
a long week... hope it will be a good one...i want to get my nails done!!! cant they dry faster?? arghh...

tired...

2008-07-17T20:37:00.000+08:00

just one word from today: TIRED.

shall see how things goes...

MONEY!!! i need more MONEY!!!

Some pics to update...

2008-07-16T20:34:00.003+08:00

been some time since i last post some pics here... decided to post some here... few of them may be repetitive from friendster or facebook.. but who cares yea? lol..

being "forced" by yi to post my photos w HER... lol... as followed... cam whoring time w her:

where's her attitude look over here? geez!!!

tt's about it for this entry. =P

Decision made...

2008-07-10T17:05:00.002+08:00

Officially make a decision... hope i will not regret... its really the money factor...
well well...

but yet to find a solution for my probs next month... i will just take things as it comes i guess...

god bless me!

stuck

2008-07-09T20:26:00.002+08:00

things din turn out the way i want and hope it will be.. i seriously have no idea how to solve the current problem ahead of me...
i seriously need some help... i just hope things will turn out fine... will that be possible??

Praying for things to turn out fine...

2008-07-09T02:42:00.002+08:00

a mth has passed since i last blog... well... i really hope i didnt make a wrong decision...right now... i just pray for things to turn out fine.. i understand that most of the times in life we cant have the best of both worlds... but i just pray... pray that this time round.. things will just turn out fine for me... i had alrdy done what i can do... just hope everything will be fine...

i think i will be super stress these few daes...

Happy Birthday, Yi!

2008-06-08T02:30:00.003+08:00

tmr shan will be starting sia training. n coincidentally same batch as xuemin... at 1st when i noe shan passed her final interview... wasnt really used to it... cant picture myself tt there will be a flight attendant among d 4 of us.... but now she is... everyone has their aim in life now... everyone except me... so so... what's next for me???

today is yi's birthday... even tho she wont be reading this... i still want to wish her a happy birthday... really hope u love our pressie... n d time spent tog jus now... n yes yes... u r OLD now too like me =p.... only shan is stil young... lol... i just hope all of us will be healthy always... (alright yi shld be d one wishing =p).. but i guess as i get older... i realise... nth matters more than health... (ahem.. mayb i shld add.. esp aft yest's tok... alright not entirely... have this mindset quite some time back)

alright... shall end here... d previous entry was on my bdae... i guess... d nex time rd will be on shan's bdae? =p

Just another Day...

2008-04-03T15:19:00.004+08:00

is my bday today... time just flies...
was with yi the other day and we were chatting...we were on certain topics and a lot of things i was saying it happened 2 yrs back.. while she tot and insisted tt it happened just last yr... den i was telling her i used to be like that... thinking tt things jus happened not long ago but it actually happened sometime back.... i guess when yi realised indeed those things happened 2 yrs back.. she was pretty "shocked" too...w how time just flies...
is just like what people always say... seems like things happen just yest... yea.. exactly.. this is how i am feeling now..
i dont feel tt i age another yr older...it jus feel like another day....but i just hope time can slow dwn a bit... so tt i can catch up with it....

anw... happy birthday... aDe!

Year 2008

2008-01-23T21:10:00.000+08:00

mayb i shld jus close this blog... instead of just leaving it here n not updating...geez

2008.... time just flies... jan 2008 is almost over... n i have been wrking for coming 6 mths... and this amounts to my 6 months of youth being wasted...

jan 1st marked a gd start for me... and i really hope this year will be a good one.. a really good one... things will be smooth.... im looking forward but at the same time im scared... i dont know what to expect.... i just hope things will always be like 1st jan 2008... a good one...

will there really be good news this year??

What kind of life is this?!?

2007-08-07T03:47:00.000+08:00

this is part of what i got from my friendster horoscope:

it is very important that you listen to your inner voice and do whatever you think is the right thing to do -- when it's the right time to do it. Paying attention to your internal clock is the best way to keep the right pace in you life, in terms of both today and the future.

but how come i dont seems to be able to do that? i hate the life im having now.. working in a job that i dont like the environment.. neither do i like the job scope.. things r just so boring...nth related to my job...not challenging at all...but everyday im forcing myself to work... just for the sake of money...

money is so impt..... i dont ever believe those saying that "money is not everything in life" anymore.. coz its all crap.. without money.. one can never do the things they like.... this is how realistic this society is... and is also a situation that im caught in... as i dont have enuff money to do things i like and got to force myself to work in a job i dislike...

life........ dont tell me my youth is gg to be wasted just like tt???

i really need a miracle.. and that's the reason i choose this template for my blog...

somehow or rather.. now i truly understand y those uncles and aunties are so crazy about lottery... coz if they struck lottery... they can really solve many problems in this realistic society...

Random Blogging

2007-07-21T22:10:00.000+08:00

been missing for two months. oh well.. reali nth to blog about. that's sad.. it jus shows how dull my life is... but its a fact i guess..

but finally.. after a yr plus.. i get to meet xiufen n lingmin today.. the last time we met was a few days before i went perth.

im really very happy to c them (even though i looked tired more than happy)..

i really treasured these 2 frenz of mine.. frenz i noe from gq but our frenships nv end there... we might not meet that often.. but when we meet.. we wont feel awkward (which we might feel that way for some frenz)... the feeling is just comfortable.. its a pity we didnt catch up much esp with fen.. but oh wells... she is the lead this evening..so is understandable...=)

nvm.. shall catch up w her and min soon.. i promised.. hehe.. it definitely wont take another yr for us to meet..

here's wishing fen a happy birthday in advance again and may u have a blessed bdae that is coming up in a few days time.. =)

and fen if u r reading this.. pls eat more.. u r so skinny!! =P

Picture of the Day...=P

2007-05-12T05:38:00.000+08:00

haven been taking photos lately...took one yesterday... so decided to upload here.. its up on my friendster too =p

I like this pic... hehe =)

A new month...

2007-05-01T22:47:00.000+08:00

can you pple believe it?? its may of yr 2007 alrdy. time just flies...

anyway... a new month... a new beginning... hope everything will go smoothly today...

sudd m thinking.. if every new month marks a new beginning.. we have 12 new beginnings in a year.. and if ur bday is not on the 1st of the month... tt will mark another new beginning and that adds on to 13 new beginnings in a year... plus the chinese lunar new yr... 14 new beginnings.. and yes yes... if u even add ur lunar bday... 15 new beginnings...

alright... lol.. u ppl out there reading must be thinking im way too bored or boh liao... but y not?? if one has 15 new beginnings a year...these new beginnings can lead on to 15 wishes...

anyway... to mark this new beginning... some photos to share even though i might alrdy uploaded them to friendster..

1st time in bridal gown... but well.. dont feel any urge of getting married tho unlike yi.. haha

i just like the way my head is tilted in this pic...

i think i look younger in this pic.. smiling w/o showing my teeth... which is rare..
i like this pic too =)

even tho this isnt me... but i like yi in this pic.. so i decided to upload here and share... hehe

my dears & i modelling for the phone... @ MOS toilet?!? =P

Looking young~~ feeling great

2007-04-30T01:37:00.000+08:00

previously, i really dont know how to react when those long time frenz of mine who hav not seen me for ages commented on me that i didnt change much when they see me recently...
esp when often most of them will comment on my other frenz that they had changed a lot and grow prettier stuff like that..(not as if i will hear get this kind of flattering comments)

but from today onwards, whomeva who commented that i still look the same.. i will take it as a compliment... coz... looking the same means i look young =p
it is also a flattering comment after all.. heehee..

nth in relation.. or maybe it is a bit related... i came up with d following conclusion...

life is short..... as time flies...... n so..........

i stil hope time will crawl... so tt i can look younger for a long time... =p

Just another day...

2007-04-04T00:09:00.000+08:00

Finally, my day is over...

officially a year older.. this year.. i realised something... even though i know that yesterday is my bday.. but never had i had such strong feelings that it is actually just another day... and actually there is nothin special about it...

anyway.. thx to my dears... ym, yi and shan for celebrating w me... and thanks for their miracle (d perfume)... haha... and not forgetting the "vouchers"...

i love u all dears... =)

Happy Birthday aDe!!!

2007-04-03T01:00:00.000+08:00

The day has finally arrived.. no more avoiding.. a fact that i need to face...even though I have been dreading..

I only sincerely wish that my birthday wish today, this year will definitely come true and no more disappointment.. and every day will be a day to rejoice..

May god bless me and grant me this favour and let my wish come true!!

Happy Birthday to myself. Happy Birthday to aDe.

Dont play this joke on me...

2007-04-02T13:44:00.000+08:00

oh god, please dont do this to me.. i cant afford this kinda joke... i already did what i can do... please dont do this to me at this point of time... this is not funny..

please please please...

god.. help me....

DREADING...

2007-03-27T14:49:00.000+08:00

exactly a week away.... seriously DREADING... y cant time just crawls??

n y m i still doing here??

gg to pass my limit soon.. tsk tsk...god.. please help and bless me...

Tsk tsk

2007-03-20T08:31:00.000+08:00

exactly 2 weeks to my bdae... tsk tsk... i dont want it to come... i dont want to be old...

once again... y cant i be a yr end baby... ? y can i be younger??

Tsk tsk...

losing hope... again

2007-03-06T19:06:00.000+08:00

a few daes ago... i was filled with hopes for this new month...

but now im having doubts again... losing hope.. losing faith... things just dun seems to go my way even when i tried...

they always say... if u dun do anything.. it will be worst... but wad about me? its not as if i dun... but y is it dat things stil dun go my way...

sighz... life...

Officially Graduated~~

2007-03-01T23:15:00.000+08:00

a new month... a new beginning.. this morning i just changed my blogskin and now...i am officially a university graduate!!!
received my degree in d afternoon... it was courier to me.. didnt expected it as earlier on i had checked with curtin graduation office and was told it will only be mail/courier to me late this month or early next month..

im so happy.. haha... i have a hunch... things will be smooth for me this month.. im sure... im very sure... =)

yipee~

New Skin...New Hope...

2007-03-01T09:26:00.000+08:00

SURPRISE!!!

yea.. indeed it is a surprise.. i cant believe it myself either. i finally decided to change my blogskin... haha.. d prev blogskin was w me for more den 1 n a half yr or so... so much longer den the 1st...

n finally... i decided to change to d 3rd blogskin... for a blog that has been w me for more den 2 yrs... been through "thick n thin" w me..and d fact tt i always neglect it...haha

i choose to change it today as it's d beg of a new month... hopefully a new month w a new blogskin will bring new hope...

and for goodness sake... its march alrdy... n once again.. i want to say... time flies... tsk... i just hope time will crawl abit slower...

alright a new month.. im gg to avoid those sensitive topics...

so yea.. y this blogskin... m sure some of u will noe... yea... its becoz of the 4 words "i need a miracle"... coz... i really need a miracle... in fact i need that miracle more than 1 n a half yr back...

i need a miracle... n i hope that miracle can come soon w dis new blogskin of mine..

*maybe.. jus maybe... w dis new blogskin... i may blog more often?? we shall c... haha*

I missed aust!!!

2007-02-26T07:50:00.000+08:00

been missing aust lately... so much more den when i just returned.. probably becoz i went to melb b4 coming back to sg... so when i just came back.. i did not miss perth as much as i miss perth now...

all d things i done.. all d frenz i make in perth...all d memories i left behind..they r so precious to me... n i really missed dem lots... sighz...

of coz.. i missed melb too.. missing my couz.. my aunt... d 2 wk stay w dem was really a very nice one... realised i forgotten to take pics w my couz until i came back.. tsk.. if not i wld be able to post up pics of my 3 young pretty couz... =)

in all.. really missed d kind of life in aust... relaxed.. comfortable... no stress (this applied to melb not perth as studying in stressful =p)..

but now.. aft 2 mths back in sg... n all d job seeking.. m still jobless.. apparently acc to ppl.. this is normal... usually it takes at least 3 mths for one to find a job... oh well.. i dunno how true is that...

right now.. i can feel n sense the invisible stress / pressure tt m getting w/o a job.. but i seriously cant do much but wait......

*interrupted by a shuai ge*

yea.. as i was sayin wait... n im really crossing my fingers hard... praying hard... tt god will bless me w a job tt i like... so that i will stay in the job for long.. and things will be more stable...

for now... m seriously thinking... shld i take up d "vase" job??? but will it be in the way for my full time job tt i believe it is coming along the way???

just a few hrs to decide... and at 0805hr now.. when i supposed to be aslp long ago (yes.. i did not slp for d nite again and it is sooooooooooooooo normal/usual of me)... n yes... i probably make d decision in my dreamz... n when i wake up in ard 3hrs time... a decision shld be made...

alright... my bed is calling out to me...shall stop here...

Reunion Dinner 16th Feb @ Tian Tian Huo Guo

2007-02-17T21:18:00.000+08:00

Had reunion dinner with my 3 beloved sis (ym, yi & shan) yest @ tian tian huo guo..

sweet rite... it was suggested by ym..

alright tho these pics r not fantastic but still...

ym& shan

yi & ym

d 4 of us...

alright.. we were bz eating so we didnt took much.. n i noe i it was a bad shot of me in the above pic.. but well...i dun care..=p

Aiming for the stars~

2007-02-09T23:13:00.000+08:00

sudd felt nervous.. even though i shld be good at it..eee.. i hate dis feeling

but oh well..i guess becoz this time rd i really put in more effort?

i really hope everything goes well.. n smth.. jus smth will come out of it... i know is poss...

may lord bless me... AMEN!

Need a Job~~~

2007-01-24T19:41:00.000+08:00

1st post in yr 2007.. but January is almost over... tsk.

nth to blog....

except that i really really need a job badly...

have been rotting at home... sigh...

hope my ideal job will be here soon...

Last Day of 2006

2006-12-31T20:25:00.000+08:00

d worst new year eve i ever had... thx to 2 of my closest frenz.. disappointment............................

n wad can i expect for the comin yr? i dunno...

i dun / cant see a life in me w/o it being given to me.....

m tired.. realli tired... so sick of everything...

y is life so tough??

Boxing Day

2006-12-26T23:33:00.000+08:00

boxing day!!

n dat also means 5 more daes to yr 2007... n wad i hoped and asked for is stil not here yet...

ask n it will be given..... when wil dat be?

a long long wait...

sighz...

Time to wake up...

2006-12-08T17:30:00.000+08:00

time jus flies.. esp this yr.. few mths jus passed like dat.. tmr, i will be back in spore.. i do look forward gg back.. to meet my frenz..
but at d same time i dun..i dread d idea of gg back when i dunno wad's d future tt lies in front of me.. i dun realli wan to wake up from dis "beautiful dream" i had in aust..sighz.. life is simply jus too contradicting i guess...

if oni m younger...

oh well... i dunno wad else i can sae...

mayb... til now to wed... i jus hoped for good exam grades..

ahz... i cant bear to leave... geezz.. do i have a choice?

Random thoughts~~

2006-11-19T21:01:00.000+08:00

my internet connection @ my hse is finally back.. im finally bloggin w my internet instead of d one at ven's place.. haha.. but well my internet is stil unstable at times..

exams r finally over for me..but i seriously hav no confidence in passing my bp paper.. but i studied.. n i did my best.. n i will think on the bright side n dat god will do the rest.. god will bless me!! i wan to grad but not to retake an extra unit...

n now.. 6 more nights.. n 5 more daes to melb.. n less den 3 wks to spore.. jus like wad i mentioned in my previous post.. m looking forward to it n yet at the same time m not looking forward to it.. im beginning to miss d frenz dat i noe here.. yet i cant wait to catch up w frenz back hm.. dere's realli no such thing as having the best of both worlds in life huh.. sighz..

n my future... it seems to be filled with uncertainty.. i realli dunno wad m i gg do.. when m back in spore.. geez..jus tinking about these 2 matters caused me to hav insomnia lately even when im freaking tired with the exam aftermath..not forgetting our random tots i hav jus b4 bed time... yucks..

wadeva it is.. for now.. i jus hope time can crawl.. so dat it will seems dat i can have more time w my frenz over here...n i dun hav to face d uncertainty dat i need to face... n yea.. please let my internet be stable for d whole of dis wk.. lol..

but for tonite n tmr.. it will be packin time for me..(i hate it!) while i wait for my frenz to finish their exams b4 is time for us to njoy..!!!

10 days, 18 days, 1mth n 2days...

2006-11-07T03:18:00.000+08:00

hav been staying over at ven's place quite often in dis 2 wks due to my stupid internet prob...gg hm in d aft.. but dere wun be internet til fri?? omg.. how m i gg to survive.. w/o internet.. i seem to b cut off from d world..haiz..

been having all d mixed feelings.. emotions.. n random tots lately.. n this is not gd given d fact tt i hav 3 papers next wk n i haven touch at all..

time flies.. n i realli dunno wad to expect.. how i shld feel n stuffz like tt..

in 10daes time.. exams will be over for me.. n in 18 daes time i will be outta perth.. n in 1mth n 2 daes time... i will be back in spore..

dis is not gd.. i want to go back to spore.. but at d same time i dun wan to go back too...
i missed d food n frenz back in spore.. but i noe when i leave here i will miss d frenz here.. like gai gai team.. fion..aaron.. n ven.. (tho ven wil be back in spore.. but aft d brk she wil be back in perth again)... n fuzion dance ppl.. tho most of dem i haven seen dem for quite sometimes..but yes...i will still miss dem... frances.. d retard =p.. brenda.. my chen lao shi... jesse.. janica.. kath...d other adeline.. oh well all of dem...
ahz...sigh...wad's this man... i dun like this feeling.. but wad can i do?haiz...

n im supposed to be studying but obviously n apparently im not.. coz i hav been on utube since i came over to ven place to stay.. oh god.. i jus dun like this.. how how how...geezzz

So Blessed

2006-10-21T08:22:00.000+08:00

oh..... i actually didnt blog for 1o days alrdy.. but oh well.. i have been bz w assg.. and i tink the whole world probably knows about it.. my unstable internet connection n recently my laptop is infected w viruses slowing down all my applications.. so oh well.. even tho im supposed to post an entry about ven bdae like ages ago w d pics.. but nono.. not now..d reason im bloggin now or shld i sae im able to blog now is oso becoz im not at hm.. n dis is smth tt i realli wan to share.. hee..

its gg to be a long one...

gai gai team was so naughty..... haha.. ermz.. actually we are not.. we haven meet up so long.. (apart from cell n sun)... so yest after cell... we really didnt plan anything.. but aaron was so hungry and we decided to go for dinner @ makan makan... and at d same time to DE-STRESS..lol

but oh well.. as they dun allow anymore dining in but oni take away.. yes.. d keywords r dun allow.. so we decided to jus order our food and take away to some where else..

we decided on milpoint on d way to fion's car..

n.. last nite was a realli good dae.. clear sky filled w stars..

so when we reached milpoint.. we went back to d same jetty again which we named it as gai gai team's jetty.. jetty no. 1456 (haha! i remembered) ..

we were eating @ d jetty and chatting.. n we were sayin tt we hoped to see shooting stars... n guess wad.. though it wasnt immediate.. we get to see shooting stars.. it was at 2+ when we sortta prepared to leave tt aaron saw a shooting star...while fion, ven n i all missed it.. as fion had not seen a shooting star before.. we decided to wait for a second one.. not long after.. 3 of us saw one shooting star except ven... and the 3rd shooting star was soon after d sec one which i missed it.. so all of us got all excited over d shooting stars and we were hoping for the 4th shooting star in which we will get to see it together... n we were sort of saying we will leave after that as all of us need the toilet too... n indeed.. not long after.. (we r so blessed!) all 4 of us saw the 4th shooting star..

we were probably very noisy w all d screaming.. haha..

anw.. it was almost 3am den..

we need the toilet quite badly n so we decided to search for one nearby.. n thankfully.. there's one nearby that is not close..

n d naughty part is... after we came out from d toilet.. we decided to go back to our gai gai team's jetty to see shooting stars till 4am.. (coz aaron told us earlier on tt the best period to see shooting stars is between 2am - 4am) this time rd we were lying down on d jetty..

n yes.. indeed.. in that one hr + .. all of us were so blessed.. i lost count after i saw like 17 shooting stars.. no exaggerating .... 17... and there are all sorts of shooting stars.. some r dim.. some r brighter in orange colour.. n wad's worth mentioning is one of d "slow mo" shooting star that travelled for quite a dist tt all 4 of us got to see..we are just so blessed..n d funny thing is.. apart from shooting stars.. we got to see moving stars.. haha.. all 4 of us saw moving stars.. it seems unconvincing.. but oh well..its a fact.. hee..so even tho.. we realli shldnt be there at tt hr.. and this period of time when we have tons of assg.. but it was all worth it....

so there's actually quite a few times we wanted to go back..or i shld say.. have the intention to go back.. but no one actually say anything and EVERYONE wants to stay for more shooting stars.. esp a big, bright and one tt travels a longer dist.. n 4 of us get to see it...and yes.. we stayed..and all sorts of stars start to come out... lol..i think i saw a "hopping star" once..

so finally.. all of us realli get to see d big, bright "shooting star" which was the sun... YES, we stayed til sun rise.. (this is supposed to be done after exams kind.. oopz).. n we r so so blessed... we saw 2 rainbows jus before the sun rise.. everything is just simply great...

so.. fion was actually hungry so we decided to go breakfast together... but it was not even 6 at tt time.. and after trying a few places.. (we didnt consider fast food).. we r now all at ven's place.. waiting for 1030 to come.. DIM SUM.. lol.. ven is slping in her room.. aaron is slping too but in d living room.. n fion is so hardworking... she is studying.. n of coz.. im blogging.. 858am... counting down.. my stomach is starting its "singing class" soon..

for now.. i really want to thx god.. even though im only here for a sem.. im realli so so blessed.. to noe so many good frenz...and all the beautiful memories from sfas...d frenz from fuzion..

n todae... i really feel so so so blessed.. 21st oct.. i will rem this dae..jus like i will rem sfas... i realli wan thx god for this dae.. the shooting stars.. w d co. of great frenz i made in perth.. d gai gai team!!!

i really dunno wad to sae...or how to sae.. but yes.. im jus so blessed..so blessed is jus d word..i thx god for all d frenz i made here.. for all d beautiful memories.. n oso to my dear frenz out dere..d gaigai team.. frenz from fuzion etc... for being part of my beautiful memories..

i love u all =) !!!

Eeeeeeeeee

2006-10-12T01:15:00.000+08:00

i cant breathe... i need a breather... d workload is killing me... i just managed to finish one.. n im still stuck w 3...geez...who cares about d strategies of coles... n wad functional strategies is nike using... n the financial payback tt im back at it again after a week... so stupid... geezz..

i nid a break.... n my twin went movie w/o me... d movie tt she is supposed to watch w me... sad eh... she break d rule#2 of gai gai team many times liao... do not leave team members...

n yes.. my laptop is infected w lots of viruses... i cant view pop ups that i click from links.. n everything take forever to load..

sigh~~

Cell Outing~

2006-10-09T20:23:00.000+08:00

Once again...this is late.. but oh well..wadeva it is.. here goes..

cell outing @ araluen

twin (ven) & me

ven, fion & me

my dear fion & me

yanping & me

yanping, me & ven

alright... after araluen.. our cell went bubble tea at manning..and aft tt... some of them decided to go hm while 5 of us... (aaron, evelyn, fion, ven & me) decided to go freo... for d sunset... n dinner...haha

@freo...

ven, fion, evelyn & me

aaron, me, fion, evelyn & ven

evelyn, fion, ven & me

- coming up next... photos taken on ven's bdae...-

n yes.. i still rem... HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my dear fren; QINWEI =)

Photos taken on frances' surprise party...

2006-10-04T04:30:00.000+08:00

this is late.. but oh well..blame it on my internet connection again... im jus gg to flood my next few posts w photos n more photos.. esp when stupid blogger oni allow a certain no. of pics per post.. irritating!!!

i really shld be slpin now manz.. im stick sick.. but well.. i realli hav no idea when i hav d time to blog.. n when wil my internet connection be working well.. so here goes...photos taken on frances's surprise party.. its like a week late.. lol... but well.. its beta to be late den nvr rite... lame.. =p

N here's some of us.... im too lazy to type all d names in... this is taken right before frances steps into fast eddys... when we were hiding in one corner =P

frances (bdae ger w d crown we bot for her..), ven

rynetta, me n janica...

d hip hop dancers tt were present tt dae...=) i miss u guys lots=) i WANT to dance =(

N those who went for frances' surprise party...

N its mil pt after d dinner at fast eddys...

stupid faces =p (ven, me, janica, frances, andrew n reena)

michelle, janica, frances, ven, me n reena

N basically all tt went mil pt after fast eddys.. oopz.. some of dem r being "cut" off.. hehe

Karaoke + Perth Royal Show

2006-10-02T12:21:00.000+08:00

alright..."thx" to my internet connection.. im alwayz laggin in my bloggin.. this will probably be a loonggggg entry

anw... on sat... ven n i did smth which was quite dumb.. but to me it was realli quite funny..

d plan tt dae is to go for karaoke after her driving lesson @northbridge and go to d perth royal show w her cousin after tt if he's free and he wld send us hm back den..

so we oni managed to meet up at ard 3+... n reached utopia @ ard 4.. we sang til ard 6+.. but as ven's cousin was not free... we decided to go off to catch d last bus which was 716@ oats street..

hah.. n well.. we missed d last bus.. so we decided to call a cab.. it took us ard 10 min to get thru d operator.. n when we finally get thru.. we waited for ard 15 min b4 ven decide to call her cousin to see if he's free to come n fetch us back..

alright.. w all d "happening" things we heard about oats street.. ven begin to feel kinda panicky while waiting for her cousin... n d retarded me started to sing songs.. in order to distract her.. lol.. oh well.. its realli dumb of us.. i must sae.. which ven was sayin.. we realli shldnt be tt dumb next time.. we came out happily w/o even thinkin of whether how r we gg to get back hm if her cousin wasnt free.. but to me.. jus stayin here for a sem.. dis dumb n stupid stuffz we did.. wil become part of my beautiful memories.. =)

so anw.. we waited for ard another 15 min.. b4 we saw a cab.. n ven n i act dumb.. coz her cousin is reachin soon.. n almost at d same time.. dere's dis dodgy guy walkin here n dere.. lying on d seats @ d bus stop.. tt cause both of us to "run" to d other side when we saw a white car which we tot was ven's cousin's car.. but oh well.. 5 min later.. ven's cousin arrived... n yea..lol..

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

sun.. aft service... we went dim sum @joy garden.. oh smth to add here.. we ordered two plates of "frances" (fried squids) n ven n i were d ones who ended up eating d most.. haha..so aft dim sum.. we went for bubble tea@ tea fusion... we r supposed to be good students n go back hm to get our work done after d bubble tea.. but oh well.. after bubble tea..it was 5+ when we (ven, fion, aaron n i) decided to go to d perth royal show to see d fireworks..

n since we were alrdy inside n d fireworks wil oni start @9.. we went ard to explore...n okie.. im gg to fastforward everything... so anw.. we took a few rides.. w two rides after d fireworks..

n d last n final ride..omg..im realli so lousy.. i felt bad.. hope i didnt spoil d day..
"thx" to my motion sickness... i nearly vomited d chips n hot dog we ate earlier.. i guess im jus gettin lousier as i get older.. coz i dun think i even had an issue w motion sickness when i was young.. but apparently.. its not d case now.. d ride.. oh well.. i cant rem d name.. but its d one beside d ferris wheel.. i realli tot my motion sickness was not tt bad.. n i cld jus give d ride a try..but well...d ride itself is not scary but d speed was realli fast... which cause my motion sickness in jus like.. less den 5 rds.. (d whole ride is probably more den 10 rds).. so imagine i was up dere.. n all d others r screamin.. n i probably scream too (softer of coz..compared to d rest..) but wad i screamed out is: i realli think i nid to vomit.. sighz
geez.. im realli lousy.. but when d ride ended.. (coz we were d last few rides).. d worker actually wanted to give us an additional rd.. but i tink d caucasians r so gg to hate me (coz i requested to come down coz i noe if im gg to have another rd.. its poss tt i can vomit out when im up dere in d ride.. ) so d whole ride ended bcoz of me..
i felt so bad.. but i realli had no choice.. i guess i realli inherited my mum's motion sickness.. in which her situation is so much worst den mine...

in d end.. i didnt vomit.. but when i get better after resting for nearly 10min n we started to leave (all d shops r closing).. i realised wad i nid is to burp out so tt i can feel better.. but obviously.. im not good in burpin unlike frances n ven...so d burpin came like few hrs later.. (which i was so much beta by den w or w/o d burping)

so again... we r supposed to head hm.. but... we ended up @mil point.. n @ d small jetty we went to after frances's surprise party... n we stayed dere for a few hrs.. chill out n chatted..n yes.. tt's when all my burping came.. so lag.. but okie minus tt.. we realli had a good chat.. n we finally decide to leave at 2+.. when it was realli getting so much colder..
but.. i realli enjoyed myself so much... i feel so blessed tt i get to noe great frenz over here in perth.. spending such wonderful times w dem.. giving me all these beautiful memories.. =)

- all photos will be posted again.. since i nid to get dem from ven.. i shall post d photos taken on frances's surprise party by den too since im running out of time now... so for now.. its jus words.. i dun care.. haha =p -

n yesh... its perth royal show again todae... w ven n her cousin...haha.. but well dis time rd.. strictly no rides...geezz

SFAS

2006-09-28T20:28:00.000+08:00

sighz... sfas is over... this also means no more dance practices... sighz... im still getting used to not having practices..all of us had bonded so well.. n is so wrong that im here at hm now facing my assg... some financial payback tt im supposed to ans for my case study which i dun even care... i shld be at dance practices..

d past mth has jus been so wonderful.. im realli blessed to know you ppl.. jus as ven thx god for guiding her to dance.. (she shld thx god for me too to ask her acc me to join dance.. haha.. =p) i realli wan to thx god for guiding me here to perth.. to zion.. to dance.. n to know these ppl... tho is jus a sem.. n i wun hav a chance to join dem in future performances.. but i realli wan thx u ppl for all these memories..ahz..i missed u guys lots...n love ya all too...(oh..... i realli feel like staying now....)

anw... here's some pics taken on the sfas d day itself..

Before sfas performance...

janica, frances n me.. (playin w ven's cam when she's doing her hair.. hah!)

we r d twins.hah! (ven n me)

stacey n me.. (oh well.. she's young... but i dun look tt old beside her rite.? hah)

my dearest chen lao shi (brenda) n me...

N jus right before d performance...

... a group photo w part of d fuzion dance team

After d performance...

ven, ailing n me

n part of d hip hop grp...

n most of d fuzion dance members...

i guess i dun hav to sae... sfas was a success... all of us did well... d applause we got from d audience.. it was jus awesome.. esp after d finale when we posed... i will alwayz rem it...i just cant wait for d dvd to be out now...=)

-coming up next... photos taken on frances' surprise party-

More photos~!!

2006-09-28T17:26:00.000+08:00

Alright... these photos shld be up like long ago.. but well my internet connect has been sooooo unstable n i oni can get it done now.. these are d pictures which r supposed to be part of d previous entry.. d final practice b4 sfas..

d 3 retards~~ (me, frances n ven)

ven, me n janica

ailing, ven n me

p/s: reason(s) behind ven n i being so retard? ask ailing.. lol

ven, me n lorraine

geeeez... we realli live up to our name for being such retards yea? (julie,ven, me n frances)

jesse, me, allen, reena n ven

-photos from sfas coming up next-

Updates!!

2006-09-22T18:05:00.000+08:00

haha.. im finally back after mia for one and a half month or so...

and even tho my blog has been ard for nearly 2 yrs.. i realised that i just hit d 100th entry todae... lol...

anw... i have been so bzzzz... im not tt 'eng' k.. (to qinz) haha.. i have been bz w dance practices..

oh yea.. jus for everyone's info.. i joined d dance ministry in my church (fuzion dance) n dere's d performance coming up just tmr.. SFAS (Search For A Star).

fuzion dance will be putting up 3 dance items: ballet, jazz and hiphop.

n yea.. im in d hip hop grp.. n after a mth of practices ... w practices every single day for the past week.. i feel so sad that everything is coming to an end... everyone of us feel so bonded.. n well so sad everything is coming to an end =( i will just miss u ppl lots!!! n now... i dun feel ly gg back spore becoz i feel so at hm here w frenz like dem...

so anw.. here's some pictures to share which was taken during yest practice... haha!!

me, ven & ling ling(she's oni 12!!! oh im so old.. oh well.. im 25 every yr!!)

'uncle andrew', ven & me

ven, kat, me & chen lao shi (brenda - she look retarded..oopz!)

me, ven & frances (our choregrapher for hip hop & d ultimate retard! lol)

lazy...

2006-08-06T22:32:00.000+08:00

alright.. wanted to blog.. but super lazy lo...

den met hua online n she ask me to blog.. lol.. alright.. im obedient.. so here i am..

Hmm..... basically aft d 1st dae of class... d other 2 daes of classes hav got nth much.. as in no cute guys..lol

alright alright.. apart from cute guys.. well d classes seem... abit wrong too.. dunno how to sae.. but we shall c... n worst.. i got one proj tt is due soon n tues i will be havin my 1st proj meetin.. can u guys believe dis.. 2nd wk of sch.. n proj meetin.. save me... when did i become so hardworking?? geez...

but wad's worth mentioning over here is d church i attend.. zion praise harvest.. zph... is simply cool... oh well.. duno how to sae.. but FUN!!! lol.. oh dere's one cute guy in dere too from south africa in fact.. is ang moh.. in case u ppl r wondering south africa?!? lol.. beautiful eyes he has..

o right.. im gonna stop w all d guys' tok...haha

n well..dere's also sat.. went to chocolate factory.. indian ocean and ngilgi caves... d indian ocean is beautiful.......... mayb d pics i post here cant see much.. but its simply beautiful... d waves.. d water is so clear.. d colour is so nice... yi n yinmei wld definitely like it if dey were here... n as for d ngilgi caves.. it is like a diff experience.. but well.. super tiring w all d stairs..oh yea.. n wine tastin at some winery... anw.. here's some pictures:

indian ocean...

n d ngilgi cave...

wanted to include a pic of me together w my hsemate n my landlord's grandniece... but well blogspot dun allow me to upload.. lol.. dunno y.. tried alot of times.. so shall post it in frenster den..

so.. shall blog again next time.. when dere r dings to blog.. n when im not lazy.. =P

Perth ...

2006-08-01T15:43:00.000+08:00

o right.. finally get my butt moving to blog dis entry aft like millions of yrs n aft 2+ wks arriving in perth...im jus way too lazy to blog... if is not bcoz of nuthin else to do... i probably wun be here..

oh well.. tt sounds so bad...

okie finally aft 2+ wks of arriving in perth.. n d 1st day of classes... wad else can i sae? thx god.
so far so gd.. but smth is funny.. todae's classes r ly filled w hongkongers? at least d pple ard me.. is ly.. by d end of d sem.. instead of pickin up better eng... i probably pick up more canto.. =P
oh n yes.. dere's smth i definitely HAVE to mention... dere is one super CUTE n HOT guy in my class.. oh well.. im not dose tt always look at guys.. but he's WAY too HOT n CUTE to go unnoticed.. too bad he was sitting somewhere far.. n he wun be attendin class for d next mth.. geez

for ppl who have been wondering.. i have long settled down..in fact i dun feel im in another country...funny rite? its probably my skin tt is not settling down yet.. im gettin rashes due to d dry weather.. o right.. tt sux.. but it seems to be getting beta too.. *crossing my fingers*

so wad hav i been doin b4 classes start todae? o right.. i have been to d city.. d fremantle.. n some nice scenery places whereby car is a must in order to get dere..

its not tt slack as i tot.. but well.. not having a night life here is stil smth i just cant help complaining...

but stil perth is a nice place esp to ppl out dere who no nid a night life unlike me.. geez

but anw.. im super lookin 4ward to sat... tt will be margaret river n choc factory day.. at least join some of dis tour.. i realised dere r things in perth to see/explore.. is jus d timing..

hope its nice..

o right.. i think im way too lazy to cont.. shall end here..

3 more days...

2006-07-13T02:46:00.000+08:00

3 days later,

I will be in perth... Hmm... but i dun feel excited...looking forward or anything... Yes.. i wan go overseas... but d place isnt australia?

anw.. it will be an almost 5 mths trip.. w melbourne after my 4months + of study in perth...

when im back in spore... 2006 wil almost be over... wad else can i sae?

sigh~

2006-06-07T15:20:00.000+08:00

One month later from my previous entry... i only got one word to sae..

sigh~~

Selected Photos from Make Over~~

2006-05-06T02:22:00.000+08:00

well... as requested by qinz.. lol... here r some of my selected make up photos... d pair up photos most of dem i cropped it.. coz i realli bloat like mad on tt dae... n i look fat if i nvr cropped.. =P

here goes...

Part 1: D 1st outfit...... d so called more natural look; more natural type of make over..

Part 2: D second outfit w d second hairstyle...

Part 3: N here's d 3rd outfit... w my beautiful necklace... haha

Finally... some pics with my confidant N hao peng you... yinmei... hehe=)

alright... tt will be all d selected photos from my make over... oh ya... not forgetting d one at d side.. which belongs to part 3.. my 3rd outfit...comments pls... hehe

I cant stand it anymore!!!!!

2006-04-29T06:18:00.000+08:00

i cant stand it anymore..........

my patience seems to be wearing out.....

optimistic?? long way to go.....

A busy week...

2006-04-18T23:32:00.000+08:00

i realised tt....it is so hard to change.. to change from a pessimist to optimist... i guess tt is y a leopard nv change it spots..

im trying tho... at least trying to get back d gd feeling i had when 2005 step into 2006... i rem i really had a great feeling at tt point of time tt it will be a gd yr... but i seemed to have lost tt feeling...*m searching back*

sigh... a pretty busy wk ahead of me.. w one module's mid term exam tmr.. n i stil have 2 n a half lect notes to go... basically.. i just read thru n nv really study... hope it works... so sick of it alrdy... *MEDIA PLANNING... GEEZZ*

after tmr.. dere's proj meeting on thu... n fri.. meet up with yp who's back frm perth...

sat... stil thinking if im going.... (if not going, at least one dae to rest)

N finally sun... d make over session.. lol... am going for d make over which was a bdae pressie frm shan, yi, ym, hua n baochan...wonder how it will turn out.. omg... im having bad skin lately.. GEEZZ... hopefully it will be fine by den..

n now? back to hit d "notes" again..

More photos taken on my Bdae~

2006-04-07T12:20:00.000+08:00

Alright.. second round n most probably d last round of selected photos on my bdae as dun think will get d rest of the photos from d other two cams soon..

anyway...d photos from last entry was from shan's cam ... n now is from aNgel's cam..

so basically.. d "leads" of this entry will all (except for one pic) be d nhps bunch.. my dear dear hao peng yous from pri sch & myself...

so here goes...

*qin & me

i really like dis pic alot.. its like one of my better shot from my pt of view.. so qin shld feel honoured..lol.. for a person ly me who is not photogenic n nan de i like a pic w me inside.. hehe

N here's..

*angel & me alright i took 2 ind pic w aNgel.. both r equally nice.. in d end i choose to post this pic.. not bcoz of d ht diff.. lol.. im not so mean.. but well..its of one d "standing pics"??

coming up is..

*min & me d 1st look at d pic.. i think i realli dun look gd... is not as if i really look gd (in person).. but well.. im always not photogenic.. but d longer i look at it.. its not bad.. quite nai kan... d only thing is i ruin d pic w my stupid hand...

Next's up r d 4 of us...
*qin, angel, min, me

i really think this is d best shot for d 4 of us... but still a flaw.. of coz it lies w me again.. big face ya... lol...

N d 3 of dem...

*qin, angel, min i think dis photo is VERY nice lor... all 3 of dem very photogenic... or is it d one takin d photo who is skilled? i think i was d photographer for this pic...lol..

Another photo of d 4 of us...

*qin, me, min, angel
wad's wrong w dis pic again?? dunno where r my eyes on... its always me ya.. =P aiz i really not photogenic la..

N d 3 of dem again...

* qin, min, angel after 2 rounds of pics.. w d 4 of us, den d 3 of dem... i realised... d 2 pics w jus d 3 of dem really look nicer den d 2 pics w d 4 of us... so shld b my prob ya..but taking w 3 photogenic pple.. wad can i sae? sad..but lucky thing is d ind pics i took w dem not so bad.. hehe

d "miscellaneous pic"... after d bdae song... lingmin offered to help me cut d cake... of coz.. it turned out dat she's not very skilled... lol.. but still.. i appreciate d help.. if its me who do it.. it will probably turn out worst... haha..

*lingmin & me

i luv strawberries... hee.. anw.. i jus like dis pic.. haha.. mayb when i dun look into d cam.. i look better? lol.. like dat quite sad eh..

alright.. tho i hav so much comments on d pics... im stil glad to hav taken quite a few pics w dem on tt dae.. as not always we hav d chance..
too bad i do not hav d scanner.. if not i cld hav post photos taken from pri sch.. n we can see d "before n after" of us.. tt will be interesting..
tt's all for this entry.....

Photos taken on my Bdae~~

2006-04-04T03:51:00.000+08:00

Alright.. i seldom post photos in this blog.. d last time was probably my bdae last yr... so now im going to do it again.. esp. w d fact tt friendster is NOT very user-friendly lor..
anw...just approve 4 bdae testimonials...like the one aNgel wrote.. *long time fren* which i wld sae.. not only long time fren n oso hao peng you... =)
coz i realised... im quite lucky afterall.. from pri sch til now.. i really made quite alot of gd frenz... tho not all of dem i contact all d time.. but d nan de thing is when we comes together.. everything is just right.. dey just fall into places nicely...
N just b4 my bdae.. i was thinking about things in d past.. how we used to hang ard at qinz's hse... n yes.. after PSLE.. celebrate qinz bdae at orchard w all those photo taking.. n den to her hse w all d water bombs.. omg.. tt is like almost a decade ago.. but it all seemed to jus happen yest...

anw here goes... my buddies cum hao peng you coming from pri sch..
*qin, me, min, angel

this photo not very nice hor? well wait til aNgel send me pics taken by her and maybe i will replace it...

N my crazy fren cum hao you coming from lower sec...
*baochan & meshe's d fren tt i will nv be taller den her... lol

Next coming up r my sisters N hao you who r alwaz dere 4 me...
*shan, yinmei, manyi, me lol...as dey r considered a gentle n quiet bunch (compared to my other frenz) esp during on my bdae, min wonder how come i cld get along w dem so well as im consider loud... but hey... im consider "all rounded" k.. w diff "types n varieties" of frenz... hahaha

N this is d part of d pressie from dem... so nice lor.. so touched k..feel ly crying when receive but nv la.. coz told myself 21st got to be happy so strictly NO tears allowed..

N here is d fren who clicked w me only last yr aft knowing each other so long.. but its never too late...
*hua & me

she got work n class yet she rush down... thx hua! appreciate lots..

N my hao peng you made from poly...
*nelson, me, lynn hmm..this pic oso so so nia.. but the other one oso so so lehz.. but nv take more eh.. aiz..i realli not photogenic leh...but d most ke xi thing about this pic is no yanping coz at perth.. not here..but am so touched she called me from perth tho...d lucky thing is stil hav nelson; my xiaodi (lol.. i jus treats him like a younger bro) n lynn...one of my smartest fren....

oh... n dere's esther who sms me from perth too..so touched..thx alot!

Finally, d final grp of frenz...frenz i made from outside whom i really clicked well w...

*lingmin, xiufen, me, cheryl dey r D "miscellaneous" grp... lol..only d smart pple from rjc ly lingmin can think of dat to fit demselves into my diff grps of frenz ranging from pri sch all d way to poly..
these r d frenz i made outside sch... well min & aNgel ask me how i noe dem.. n i just insist outside lor...

With d bdae songs in d bkgrd... here's my cute little bdae cake... y is it tt cute lehz... coz actually is not by me.. is from my sec sch frenz tt grp of sisters... guess dey dunno d no. of pple i invited so turn out so cute... just tt so paiseh lingmin, fen & cheryl ate d leftover part... n yet dun mind... but but.. i stil wan thx my dearest sisters for d cake.. if not no cake le...but hey... i jus realised n saw tt d three candles tt represent my 21st... tt small candle tt represent d 1st tilted lor... SEE... even d candle dun wan me turn 21st yeah... LOL N well.. i requested for third language n i got canto one back w nel singing d loudest of coz... n min sae tt im like celebrating my 70th bdae coz usually canto bdae songs r meant for d elderly (from tv series) which is quite true la... but i dun care =P

N these r the frenz who spent my 21st bdae w me...

but the pity thing is tt it was taken after baochan left.. aiz..

anw thx alot all my hao peng you... whether from pri, sec, poly or d "miscellaneous".. THANKS ALOT for coming... i APPRECIATE LOTS... N had enjoyed myself...sorry 4 zhao dai bu zhou eh.. but hope dat those who came had enjoyed too...LOVE YA ALL!!

hmm.. but lucky thing i nv throw a party like min or aNgel coz i think by den i even more cant handle?? of coz in d 1st place my frenz wun b as much as dem... lol.. but... a pity some i wan invite cld not come if not r at overseas...anw... i really want thank god...coz im really lucky for all d wonderful frenz i had made in diff stages of my life...like wad shan sae.. all my frenz r very gd... n i AGREE... hee...

wow... very long nv blog such a long entry le..but am still feeling happi.. hehe.. n hope it wil mark a good start for me to change to a more optimistic person...

well anyway... more to come for d photos after i got dem from all d frenz...

btw... thanks all my hao peng you for all d cameras...=)=)

Happy Birthday to Myself!!!

2006-04-03T08:48:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday to Myself!!! Since its a day tt i hav to face it... i told myself i will be staying happy for today...

N yes... i hav been too pessimistic for d past yrs... so stepping into another stage of my life... i hope to be more optimistic.. n will try my best to do it... hopefully w a more positive thinking.. every things will go more smoothly n positively...

Well... birthday.. dere will be birthday wishes... but i guess i wont list dem out since wishes r not meant to say it out rite... but i really hope my ***** will come true **** ****. Hope dere will be good news soon... i must be optimistic... n wait patiently...

Anw.. time for bed now..haven slp for d whole nite... later goin for steamboat... see some of ya laterzz... thx for spending my bdae w me =)=)

Happy April fOOLs' Day!!!

2006-04-01T03:37:00.000+08:00

lol... Happy April Fools' Day!!!

but well.. dis day isnt anything special/fun to me since i grad from sec sch.. guess is more of a kid/teen thingy??

wadeva it is.. still wan wish pple out dere a Happy April Fools' Day...

Alright.. stepping into April.. in less den 48 hrs.. im officially an adult... arghh...

whether is d society tt is realistic about d age or is me... age is really catching up me..geez... i sound like a 50yr old woman.. lol

well.. pple.. dun mind me always complaining tt im old.. i wun complain on mon tho.. n hav a happy 21st.. so tt my 21st yr will be a great one..!!

but jus for now... old old old!!!

hopefully i can get my best 21st pressie.. d one im waiting... n tt will make me shut up!! =p *crossing fingers*

Time flies...

2006-03-25T21:58:00.000+08:00

i jus cant help it... but time flies.. it flies way too fast...

did you guys notice tt it is alrdy march of 2006 le.. when it just seems like jan??

looking at my recent posts.. it is oni my tenth entry of d yr and we r alrdy stepping into apr..

in a blink of time half of 2006 will be gone.. n we r waiting to welcome 2007..

so scary.. it really freaks me out...

but what can i do??

Is it that important??

2006-03-23T08:35:00.000+08:00

im thinking lately... is studying that important? Or maybe I should say is a degree that important?? does that paper worth that much??

qualification... how much does it count in this society?? is that important?

to me.. i think one shld finish a certain level of education tho.. like me.. i think diploma is d 'cut off point'..

other den tt..im pretty sick with studying... esp. to me a degree isnt tt important.. cause i always think tt i dun wan to end up in office work next time... but will i be able to escape from tt destiny??

anyway... pls dun ask me why im studying for a degree since i dun think a degree is tt impt and pls dun ask me wad i wan to work next time if is not office work... *sigh*

Long way to go...

2006-03-18T00:44:00.000+08:00

sigh... including this sem... i still hav 7 more modules to go b4 i grad... and it is realli a torture... the workload is getting heavier n heavier esp with each proj getting tougher n tougher...

i really dunno how am i going to survive... i need help.. i need luck.. i need miracle.. i need god to help me change d current situation...

i hate studying!!! i dun wan to study............

Stages in LiFe

2006-03-13T21:00:00.001+08:00

how many stages do we have to go thru in life?? was thinking bout this recently...

for d females:
(beg from d day born) --> one month --> walk/talk/--> pre-nursery/nursery-->k1/k2--> age 7 (pri sch)---> age 10 (p4 streaming) ---> age 12 (PSLE) --> age 13--> 1st yr in sec sch--> age 14 (choosing sub) ---> age 16 ('O' level)---> 'A' level / Diploma ---> Bachelor / Honours degree ?--> Masters? --> Work --> Married --> Give birth

for d males:

(same as the females all d way 'A' level / Diploma) --> NS --> Bachelor or Honours degree? --> Masters? --> Work --> Married ---> Work

Alright... it might seems alot of stages.. but actually most of us are alrdy at the Bachelor / Honours degree stage or if some of us stopped studying after diploma, they are already working... which means we are all actually at the last few stages of life...

life is really short and time really flies... but to me I look at the stages of life in d following way instead:

(for d females)
born --> one month --> walk/ talk --> Pri 1 --> Pri 6 --> 'O' level --> age 18 (half adult) --> age 19 (final yr as teen) --> 21 (officially an adult) --> after which time just flies by in a blink

to the sociey, for d females... please get married b4 30. coz after 30 u r rotten flower le.. 40 needless to sae...

but for d males.. to d society.. 30.. u r still YOUNG. 40.. u have d 'NAN REN WEI' ... so even if u r only intending to start a family after 40.. its still alright..

how realistic can this society be??

alright.. i guess im jus being too boh liao to most of the pple reading this.. but was jus thinking about dis lately..

anyway.. life is short.. n it seems even shorter for d females... so do treasure it.. n pursue wadeva things tt u feel like pursuing b4 time dun allows....

D thinker...

2006-03-02T03:30:00.000+08:00

i wish i can stop being passive..passive is d word right.. (bei dong).. sigh.. my eng is getting lousier.. cant even rem wad is bei dong in eng...

wadeva it is.. i wish i can stop being bei dong.. coz its irritating me... i know d way/path/things i want.. but sometimes.. or i shld sae most of the times.. most of d things.. or i shld sae everything.. i will bound to be bei dong even for 5 sec, 10 sec..? so w many things dat come in my mind for 5 sec, 10 sec... its definitely making me go crazy... sigh..
and of coz.. i dun wan those bei dong tots...

well...it might be bcoz of my 'thinker' character... coz me to think of stuff dat i dun wan think.. which include all these bei dong tots...

and one thing i must sae... there's realli sixth sense this kinda thing.. sixth sense as in not one suspicious of something/someone those kind of sixth sense.. but d authentic kind of sixth sense..

i really have those type of sixth sense.. its comes when i unexpectedly all d time.. n how do i noe they r my sixth sense.. ? coz my brain/mind is always filled w all sorts of tots.. not resting at all.. even when im slping.. im dreaming.. (so well its working..).. so the sixth sense comes usually when my brain/mind is not thinking tt much or not thinking anything.. its scary...realli.. esp.. the fact tt so far.. all my sixth sense r all about bad things... which i rather not have it... sigh..

if oni i dun hav those bei dong tots.. if oni i dun hav d sixth sense.. mayb my life will be happier??

20th or 21st?? Does that matters?!?

2006-02-25T03:20:00.000+08:00

just went i got used to d fact tt im 20.. im turning 21st in less den 40 daes?? tt sux...

okie la... pple.. im not tt concerned about age.. d figures actually... coz i still feel d way i feel 2 yrs back???but i guess somehow i keep toking about it is coz.. d society is concerned about it... esp for d ladies..

males can start their careers at 30 or 30+.. dey still get d encouragement.. still young... bla bla.. but for d females when u r 30... face it.. u R just too old...esp for ladies who r not married by den.. (oopz.. i think im referring to myself..)

but dis society... is simply too realistic.. u cant do something bcoz u reached this age... bla bla...sigh

so wad's d conclusion? so wad if i dun care bout d figures... d society cares... there's d saying.. youth is always d best.. (smthng like this)... therefore... even if i dun mind.. i still dun wan turn 21...my youth is running out...

but wad can i do? im still getting older with each sec, each min passed...

N smthng i dun understand... why is it tt d 1st thing tt came into pple's mind when one turn 21 is tt can watch RA show le? LOL... something i will nvr understand.. r dey realli dat keen in RA show... lol

Xuemin's Bday cUm Minor NHps gathering

2006-02-13T23:47:00.000+08:00

todae went to xuemin's 21st bdae bbq at chevrons..

hailing from nhps... there are qinwei, qiuting, yixian, xinlun, violet, kelvin, angeline and me.. hahaz...

oh well... except for qinwei, i didnt see d guys for ages... pple like qiuting, yixian, xinlun, kelvin... (violet- met her once at clementi's bus stop)... as for angeline.. alright.. other den qinwei, she's probably d second one i contacted most over dere...

anyway, xuemin.. her bday celebration.. of coz busy all d way.. n we didnt get to tok to her often...so d group of us chatted among ourselves most of d time...

its was really great catching up w all of dem... after like ages since i last saw most of dem...w all those little chats...N of coz.. all smart pple.. all studying in NUS now.. (tho i didnt apply for any local uni) but of coz its not as if i will get in...hahz.. i guess in d 1st place... studying is not my 1st priority...

but apart from dat.. actually.. i think all of us didnt change much ba... N i actually dun feel any 'walls' between or among dem even tho we didnt c each other for so long... hee.. tt's gd...

hope can get to see dem again soon~~

Happy CNY!!!

2006-01-29T23:38:00.000+08:00

time flies... in a blink of time.. 2005 is history. And now...its the Chinese New Year alrdy... the dog year le... mayb im more towards the western side.. so stepping into d dog yr... i dun feel much as compared to when stepping into 2006...

n this year chinese new year is even quieter... as d years passed by chinese new yr seems to be getting quieter but this year, it seems to be d quietest... no chinese new year ambience... there's very little the 'so called' chinese new year food at home too...

and the 1st time in 20 yrs.. or at least d 1st time i can rem...tt the 1st day of chinese new year i need not go visiting... bcoz mum's not feeling well...

well well.. wad can i say for this chinese new yr??? i think i just cant let it go anymore quieter...

so well, here's wishing everyone a Happy Chinese New Year!!! Hav fun!!!

A new year, a new beginning

2006-01-11T23:06:00.000+08:00

well...it is the 11th day of yr 2006 le... n in less than an hr... it will be the 12th day.

anw 1st time i can hav the feeling of ' a new year, a new beginning'. i can rem tt feeling is simple great on the 1st day of 2006... even til now... i feel so too..(maybe except for the fact tt im turning older and when i got to noe younger frenz tt is like 4 yrs younger den me... tt's the age of my cousin).

but at least for now.. i dun wan to be bothered by d age issue...
i just want 2006 to be a gd yr for me... a gd yr for everyone...n i need more luck this yr...heehee!!

all d best everyone... 4 2006 n for d yrs ahead of us =)

p/s: d past is alrdy history... wad's impt is d future.

HaPPy 2006!!

2006-01-01T12:20:00.000+08:00

its d 1st day of a new yr.. 1st day of 2006 today... happy 2006, HaPPy NeW YeAr!!!

A new year, a new beginning. dunno y... but stepping into 2006... i felt great. hahaz.. 1st time i felt so positive. mayb... hopefully or it definitely will just be a good yr for me!!!

but again... stepping into a new yr also means tt im getting older.. omg... in 4 mths time... im officially an adult... geezz.. how i wish im born later in a yr... well well.. no matter wad.. nuthin is gonna spoil my mood todae.. hee...

wishes for d new yr; 2006: - (as usual)
1) all my family members, relatives (including myself), frenz & their family & basically all d pple i know to be in safe N in good health always.
2) this is impt to me personally - may my dream come true!!!
3) something to add from my xmas wishes n sincerely from me - i really want world peace n no more natural disasters n stuffz...

LaSt DaY of 2005!

2005-12-31T21:33:00.000+08:00

today its d last day of 2005... time realli flies...its realli scary...

2005... d only thing tt i want say is tt it wasnt a realli gd yr for me... lack of luck is d key issue for me in 2005.. well.. as for details... i realli dun wan bring it up again...
but hopefully.. stepping into 2006...things wld be better...

well... may my wishes come true.. hee... same to all d pple out there...=)

alright.. going out for countdown now... pplz out there... do enjoy d last day of 2005... !!!

Merry Xmas!!!

2005-12-25T00:24:00.000+08:00

hohoho~~ its xmas todae... MeRRy XmAs to all!!!

May all of ya dreamz come true!!!

My wishes for xmas:
1) good health always - my family, relatives, friends& their family, all d people i know... oh n Myself!!
2) may my dream come true b4 d next xmas!!!

Which path to choose?

2005-12-21T02:40:00.000+08:00

As one grows older, responsibilities come in naturally... now in front of me... there's two paths... one concern responsibilities...and most pple will agree on... d other is more of d path i prefer.. n if goes well, it wun affect my responsibilities too... however, the thing is tt path is not so smooth.. or shld i say.. is not even smooth...its pretty 'rough' in fact tt had caused me so much bruises and wounds...and im not even sure if it will be able to turn out well in d end...

i dunno...i oni know...im stuck, realli stuck... but just knowing tt im stuck is not enuff... i still have to come up with something... im still in reality afterall... i realli cant avoid anymore...

time is running out... i realli got to do something... but what can i do??? im really clueless... if i dun choose d path i prefer.. i know i will regret...but the thing is... trying on the path i prefer.. i realized tt its not really... "if nv give up... will succeeds eventually"... tt saying dun seems to apply here... so am i supposed to take tt path whereby everyone agrees on... n adopt the saying "if its mine.. its mine"... i will still be able to step back to d path i prefer even with 0.00000000000001 % chance or luck? just like my mum always sae.. i do not have enuff faith in god... if i have... there will be the 0.000000000000000001% chance or luck...for me to get to the destination of my desired path eventually..

so do i realli have not enuff faith???? i dunno... i oni know i went thru quite a few setbacks... n time is running out... if i give up the path i prefer... i cant see the 0.000000000000001% chance or luck.. coz i always have no luck... n things might be too late later...n i will regret by den... n given life tt is so short.. n unpredictable... (heard from my mum tt my uncle's sister die just from a fall)... shldnt i not give up 2?? haiz...i realli dunno...
i guess i jus do not believe myself have tt i have the 0.00000000000000001% chance or luck(if i would choose the path tt most pple agree on)...as i always have no luck...coz i always believe if i have it... im alrdy at d destination of d path i prefer..but now im still here.. so does tt mean i have no faith in god... tt god will help me to get to d destination of the path i prefer eventually...n of coz b4 everything is too late.. which is next yr??

so what shall i do??? i realli had no idea... i only know tt.. now i realized why there is the saying tt "sometimes its better not to have choices".. coz i really dunno how to make a choice... to choose the path... however... if in d 1st place... there is the choice for me to make... i wun even be stuck in this dilemma now...

oh god.. what shall i do?? which path to take??? which saying to adopt???

HaPPy BirThdAe!!!

2005-12-18T19:01:00.000+08:00

its my blog a yr old today.. hahz.. n it happened to be nelson's bday too.. so happy birthday to my blog n nelson... =)

I wish I can avoid...forever...

2005-12-12T01:04:00.000+08:00

alright.. im in a serious dilemma now...

i really need to make a decision tt i have been avoiding for a month or so soon... by fri... b4 everything is too late..

but oh gosh.. i seriously dunno how to make d decision... coz i always make decisions tt i regret.. n this time round... i simply dunno wad to do.. (if not i wld not be avoiding)...

some pple complain when they can make choices.. coz dey rather there r no choices so tt they have to think so much.. n jus take d only choice..

but i wish i cld make a choice... but i cant.. if i cld make a choice.. i will be able to know how to make a decision for my current situation... aiz..

but now im realli standing at d edge of a cliff... is ly.. whether i make decision a.. or make decision b.. neither of dem r right.. n making either decision will make me regret.. but d thing is... i dun wan to regret anymore...

OMG!!! i seriously need a miracle to help me w this.............. but why doesnt miracle seems to happen on me???

SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Life is Unfair???

2005-12-11T22:38:00.000+08:00

life is unfair??? hahz... i dunno... but i rem during one of d church service quite some time ago.. the pastor mentioned b4 a scenario:

some workers came to work early in d morning til late at night and get paid amount $X at d end of the day as promised... (which will be enuff for dem for their living for tt dae)
as the employers wan speed up work.. they hire workers sae 2 hrs later... and at d end of the dae, they got $X too..
as there are not enuff workers... another 2 hrs later.. more workers are hired... and so on... however, all d workers are paid $X.
of course d workers who worked for the most no. of hrs complained tt this is unfair...

wad's d moral behind this scenario? i find it so meaningful and tt's y i rem this even til now..

the employers promised the workers who worked the longest for $X amt. of money and pay dem as promised and the amt were enuff for dem...
yes.. they pay the same even to other workers who came late too...
but if the workers who worked d longest did not compare and just based on what they earn (as promised by d employers)... and which are enuff for dem...there is no unfairness present..

(sorry to pple out there reading this...esp...if i did not explain this scenario well enuff)..

fair or unfair?!? it depends on how one judge...but well.. after i heard this... i try my hard not to compare w others... i told myself tt as long as i alrdy have wad i need i will not compare even if others have better stuffz den me...

but well... this is something tt i kept asking myself some time ago.. now.. not so much.. well anw... im wondering... it might not be a need for me.. it may be more of a want to me... actually.. it might not be a need to others too... n for some they might not want it too.. but they just happen to get it... n yet i do not.. given this situation, i cant help but compare.. or ask... so how do i handle this? u can sae i want it badly.. n will not give up tt easily... so fair or unfair??

another thing tt i will nvr understand.. actually... i have pple ard me or pple tt i seen who r very fortunate... they have things i dun have... or hav things i envy... or d things i hoped for... and yes.. dey might ask for more... n sometimes... or u can sae most of d times.. they got wad dey want... but yet im only asking for one thing... but its always unreachable.. or i just missed it.. by one small step.......

is it really d luck will oni find d lucky pple? n d riches will oni find d rich pple? fair or unfair? i really dunno...

alot of things.. i envy or pple have i dun hav.. i can give up.. but can i just have tt one thing???

I just dont believe it...

2005-12-10T19:58:00.000+08:00

yesh.. life is contradicting.. and i realli think in life.. everyone needs to learn 'zuo ren'.. and i think this requires a relatively high eq n knowledge...N ... not everyone is able to do it... if not there wun be so many unhappiness in this world... or worst.. suicide cases...

N i think for me.. im still learning too.. after d previous post.. i jus decided..i jus dun wan to believe... N dun believe...tt i will always be tt unlucky in life...so i decided to adopt d "nv give up" saying in life... coz... i must have faith... if not, i realli dunno how to continue with d path ahead of me.... i know is tough.. esp. falling on d same spots over n over again... but honestly.. i realli dunno wad else can i do le...

Life is... simply contradicting

2005-12-04T21:53:00.000+08:00

life is... simply too contradicting..

there is d saying..."Certain things are simply fated".. but does tt contradict with "Nothing in life is impossible"??
there is also d saying.. "sometimes one shld not be too stubborn..one shld learn to let go at times".. or "if it is urs, it will be urs "... but doesnt tt also contradict w "if u work hard, u will be able to achieve ur goal one day".. bcoz of these... i really want to know.. which one shld i adopt in my life.. or i shld sae.. mayb i know.. or maybe it is.. tt certain situation.. one adopt different saying as mentioned above.. but the thing is when to do so..? when to adopt which? im realli not able to determine.. i believe.. many of us think so.. and now.. bcoz of these sayings.. im realli stuck in a dilema..can someone tell me which to adopt? i think it oni makes life more contradicting... aiz.. if oni im stil a kid.. n will not need to know so much..n think so much...

I really don't understand...

2005-12-02T11:39:00.001+08:00

its been a mth since i last blog but so much things had happen over this last month...

i really dont understand; am i really asking for too much? i know, i know, i know.. i can choose not to feel this way.. a person's mood is determine by him/herself... in fact i tried to avoid thinking in order to feel better (in fact i tried avoiding it 4 nearly 2 wks alrdy w/o thinking much) but as all of us & i know...i still have to face it eventually... and when i try to face it..its all back to... i really dont understand...
which i noe.. i dont have to understand god's ways of doing things but seriously if all im going thru is god's arrangement... i just cant help & wonder y do god want me to go thru all these...i really dont understand...what can be worst den me wasting time now? N if miracles do happen, they really dont come to me.. its obvious... way to obvious... if not, i wont be wasting time here, getting all d naggin from my mum, feeling lost & guilty, falling on d same spot over & over again...+ d tears i have shed... n not forgetting i just missed a final possibility...

i also came to fully understand & experience what it means by " its so near yet so far"... im just so near to it... but yet in d end... im still not able to get it....why??? i just missed it by a little...why??and d thing is... is not tt i dont want to work hard to achieve it.. but really in this world.. there are things that not hard work can achieve it..luck play a bigger part.. and maybe it applies here too to my situation n im a person w no luck...

i really dont understand... exactly how much more time do i need/have to waste?? i really dont know how to carry on walking... really don't know.. i felt so helpless & hopeless... mayb sometimes i feel scare or afraid but it dont last and im realli serious & determine that this is wad i wan to do... so im really not able to give up... not tt i dont want but i could not.. mayb in my life i could give up on many things but for this im sure i cant... coz this is d 2nd time i felt so sure i wanted to so something in life....
in life.. not able to do something u like/want.. it really sucks... i rem myself asking: if it a tragedy is when someone had an interest in something n yet do not pursue it.. den what about when someone had an interest in something but had no chance to pursue it? " i belong to d latter..

i really really hope.. someday soon.. im able to blog here that im finally able to do something i want & not tt i fell down on d same spot again....(will a miracle stil happen even aft i missed my last chance???)

p/s: mayb.. i shld change jus d title of my blog from "tears in heaven" to "tears in my heart"...

Why r things in D past better??

2005-10-30T23:50:00.000+08:00

this is something so true tt i must agree...

why do people always feel that things are always better in D past? actually.. its simply... those things are already history n no longer exists........

so.. tt's why...

hmm... but mayb tt is not d case of mine... coz im hoping for a better future...oh i shld sae believing instead of hoping...

coz believing is even better n effective den hoping.. if u hope but dun believe it is useless...[something tt i heard n agree too]

well.. haha.. seems like im crapping after not blogging for so long... well.. i guess tt's basically how i spent my life lately... geezz

Can someone tell me why?

2005-09-09T16:30:00.000+08:00

was watching a drama series the other day and find this particular phrase/sentence interesting.. it says : it is a tragedy if u have an interest in something... yet u do not pursue it.

right after i hear this... i wonder... if tt is a tragedy.. wad is it called.. if u have an interest in something, want to pursue it but do not have a chance to do it? shan told me is a disaster.. well... i think is probably a disaster n tragedy which probably keep torturing u n bring u pain n feel lost in life...

i guess.. tt is probably how i am feeling now..

i always have no luck... and i do not want to depends on luck...even if i want to believe and depend on.. i depend on miracle.. miracle tt only lord can give me.. but these days.. i start to think tt im having those bad luck... i always dun wan turn 20... n so far after being 5mths of 20yrs old.. it realli hasnt been a smooth 20yrs old path...something tt i have confidence on...is making me super demoralize now....i guess.. i nvr felt this demoralize before n i don't feel good at all n i hate this feeling... i really dun understand... what is happening? can someone tell me why? i really don't want to give up...and can't give up... oh lord... please..please..help me...

i think i really need a miracle now... which only god can help me........................

*sad,demoralized*

r those words true?

2005-08-15T00:00:00.000+08:00

i have been wondering... when two persons quarrel, what they say.. are they really like what people say... only 'qi hua' / saying those words only becoz they are angry... or actually.. when one is angry.. or not just when angry... when they aee frustrated...what they say might be how they actually feel? i mean if they don't feel this way in their hearts or if they do not have this thinking, they won't even say those words...

personally.. i think even if those words are true, people have this thinking... and even i myself think is a fact... i really think it is alright... but when those words are what they think but that isn't what im or what i think or what i feel... i guess tt realli hurts... coz im one victim right now...

I took up the fear!!!

2005-08-07T21:58:00.000+08:00

from the previous post, i ask myself n u people which one to choose... n now... w todae's blog.. i can tell people out there.... i took up the fear le... yes, i dun feel regret.. but i guess i feel disappointed even though regret... disappointed w myself..so if disappointed is another kind of regret.. that will be mine...

hmm.. i dunno wad to say.. but i guess i realli realli desperately.. need a miracle... a miracle to happen... the miracle i hoped for... n only god can help me... if miracle ever happen, they are only made happen by god...

may lord and father bless n help me..

but anw... jus wan sae... for people out there who is reading this...if there is regret/fear.. choose to take up fear.. coz if u choose regret...it will be the whole life.. life is short.. n youth is even shorter..do things while u still have the heart n ability... tt's my experience.. haha..sounds so old..well...but i mean it though..

that's it for now.....

Just blogging..

2005-08-05T14:21:00.000+08:00

todae went back to get the diploma cert... hahz although alrdy graduate from ngee ann a few months le.. but hahz its not the proper graduation w/o the cert.. now w the cert... a full graduation from poly le.. geezz..well.. really like what lina mentioned in her blog.. studied in poly for 3yrs just for the big cert.. ha.. its realli quite big... :P

anw.. needless to say.. yest was a terrible day... m glad i survived.. it was so weird attending the evening c lass w many coming from the working society and i feel so out of place... luckily managed to make a fren..so guess n hope next wk not so bad lor...

aiz...these few days i cant help taking extra notice on children, kids or secondary school students... time realli flies... how nice it is to be like dem... younger w less worries, less responsibilities and less stress.. and for really young children..m probably none of those too.. oh..i really miss the time... miss the feeling of being ignorant and don't have to think so much... but really.. there's no turning back of time.. the time will only pass by sec by sec, min by min, hour by hour, day by day, month by month and yr by yr. In a blink of time, i will be in my 30s, 40s, 50s...

life is just that... i guess for now most importantly is make use of the youth we stil have, experience and do things that make ya life unforgettable.. at least wun have regrets...
n now for me... there's this experience/challenge for me to take up.. i had agreed to take up and try but part of me feel like backing up.. i feel so scared suddenly.. its scary... but at the same time..i know if i don't do it, i will regret...

regret and fear... which one should i choose.. i think i have an answer.. but....wad will you choose, people.. if u r me?? haiz....

Start Lesson le....

2005-08-04T02:22:00.000+08:00

todae.. eh or rather yest started lesson le.. 1st lect is on consumer behaviour and its 3 hrs... super bored... 4mths+ did not touch any books.. i guess i realli kinda lost touch le...

worst til.. todae having 2 lect , one from 2-5pm and the other from 7-10pm... dunno how i am going get through this.. someone pls save me.. geezz..

hmm.. well.. im freaking out now.. doing something tt i will NOT do... yes its an experience n i think i wun regret... but im seriously freaking out... oh my god.. dun think i will be able to sleep well tonight.. well.. its natural to freak out but i guess im having the worst scenario that i ever had... geeeezz.. looks like i need some real help here... lord, pls let tt freaking out feeling go away.. and let everything go smoothly..

it will be alright.. everything will be... god bless me!!!

I dun wan to envy others!

2005-07-30T01:00:00.000+08:00

since young... i had been envying others... envying others on something that i want or hope for, they have and something i look forward for... they have the care and concern im looking for too..

apparently, these people that i envy dun really seems to appreciate at all... are all humans lydat?

okay.. anyway, tt not my main point here...

i guess those kind of things that make me envy others ... i wun be looking forward to anymore.. have it i take it as additional bonus.. dun have it.. i really dun mind...

but there is really one thing.. just one thing that i envy about.. that i hope for and look forward to after 3 yrs (i think)...i DUN wan to envy others...i WAN to do it...
i guess y is tt so....is simply...this is not plain envy... it is something i really want to do... n i know only god can help me......

Praying hard....

2005-07-16T20:20:00.000+08:00

its been a month since i last posted.. been very slack cum lazy... the only thing tt is functioning all the time is my brain..

well.. done alot of thinking lately. finally settled my study thing.. will be doing one sem here n off i go... but well... is it wad i want? for pple who know me well... u might feel like slapping me.. but still i want to ask.. is tt wad i want or looking for? n is this the path god had arranged for me?
but somehow i noe deep in me.. tt is not wad i wan.. at least for now...

but...till now i still dunno wad is the path that god had arranged for me... howeva i have been praying.. praying that it is that path that i have been waiting..

i really hope there wun be another disappointment out there anymore...

haiz.. =(

Making a decision can be a pain

2005-06-15T08:50:00.000+08:00

realli thinking of closing this blog thingy coz haven been updating... the last time i updated was last month more than half month ++ ago??
well well leave it here 1st ba.. if realli nuthin much to blog le den mayb will jus close it..

aiz.. lately really fan... dunno whether to study overseas.. or study private here den wait til last sem den go over aust to study... making a decision had nvr been so fan n troublesome den this time round... but i noe to save money.. shld study half here half there... but now worried about if the exemption duration will be the same anot.. hope will ba... may god help n guide me....hope this will be over soon n latest by next wk everything will be settled......................

Im so happy today!!!

2005-05-27T17:56:00.000+08:00

from my previous post on mon, i mentioned about clearing the air with a fren... yesh.. i finally done that today... Im so happy.. thanks to lord.. everything went well.. i dunno wad to say except that im realli happy everything is cleared... really happy...hee.. =>

my advice to anyone out there who had any misunderstandings with any of your friends, pls go clear the air with them... dun let any misunderstandings ruin the friendship between u all.. its not worth... i took 2 yrs+ to realize that.. and i can say its NOT worth losing a friend over misunderstandings or quarrels etc.. well.. of course i must say..it takes courage to take the 1st step but when everything is cleared u will noe that is it WORTH it.. trust me pplez.. go ahead!!!

Today is Mr Tan's BIG DAY...

2005-05-23T21:21:00.000+08:00

why does 2 wks + pass by in a blink? after 2 wks + i must say for asian countries, i realli ly hk.. and for the 2wks + i realli had so much fun.. i realli tot i could have jus stay there and not come back. but well.. im alrdy back.. almost 3 wks somemore..n for these 3 wks.. dun think i have been productive... dun even noe how did i spend my daes... oh dear.. im felt restless and useless too..lazy to blog too..until now when im finally willing to blog... i do mean finally.. 2wks + of time in hk.. not much of internet.. so im realli lazy... n now when im back it seems that it is a habit not to blog... or maybe there is realli nuthin special for me to blog...

n finally.... when we grad from sec sch... mr tan was stil single.. if i nvr rem wrongly.. i told him to get a gf soon.. n yes.. its his big day today and the few of us cheryl huiwen wanyi angeline n i went to attend his church wedding... well.. well.. realli happi for him... once again.. congrats mr tan!!! though it seems impossible that u will be reading this.. but still congrats!!
and i realized.. actually many of us (as in his 1st batch of students 4C '01) attended his wedding.. so i realli met alot of sec sch frenz/mates.. and some realli change pretty much.. ly yf.. okie... he is slimmer now.. as in ALOT.. haha.. after much deliberation.. so angeline did ask him wad is his secret receipe.. and guess that is to jog EVERYDAY.. well tough work there pple..!! oh n there is cs.. taller.. the most paiseh thing for him i think is when mr tan sae.. hey u grow up so much.. diao..

so after the wedding we loiter ard.. taking photos and after which went for lunch to catch up.. the five of us + weiching, peizhen n shuting.

okies.. so we went to holland v for lunch.. chatted eat..i guess its mostly casual chats...mid way thru.. cheryl wan go hm change car w dad.. oh n i went w her as i just wanted to get myself out of tt stupid skirt n heels (well, i stay near cheryl so it was on the way)... so we went back after tt...to join the rest of dem.. after which, we didnt stay long though.. coz it seems like all of dem were over-enthu when we went hm.. so when we were back to join dem.. most of dem seems in hibernate mode... so we split soon.. w me, wanyi, weiching, peizhen n shuting going to westmall.. hw hm.. cheryl n angel-meet bf.. well... i guess the interesting came in on bus.. when wy sudd ask me a qn.. it was interesting as in the way she sudd becum serious and ask me the seriously.. well actually i wan to thank her.. the qn she ask me makes me feel better.. i shld sae makes me feel more sure of wad to do.. thanks wy!! (possibility she reading this will be low too)

oh n she shared something w me too.. ( i grateful for tt too- i mean after not meeting so long, who will shared something w u jus lydat?) but well.. becoz of wad she shared too.. i realized her way of handling thing/thinking is rather similar to me.. at least my past me.. now.. i not sure.. coz i noe i changed.. as to how much.. i dunno... well of coz i cant say anything about her situation but i must sae when she sae the 1st statement.. the 1st thing tt came to my mind is.. oh my gosh.. its so ly hw n my case in sec sch... tt's y i mentioned jus now wy is similar to the past me..
maybe after so many years... even til now.. some times seeing hw.. i still find it a pity that we ended lydat..but im stil grateful.. i mean realli.. realli grateful to god.. i noe it things cld have even be worst den todae but i think both of us tried..tried to put the past behind us le ba.. even now i c.. we cant be frenz who confide to each other... but i guess we r still gd frenz ba... definitely not as gd as last time.. but as i sae.. im grateful enuff le... after so many years.. i have learnt.. certain things realli cannot cling on too.. hold on too tight..whether is bgr or friendship.. coz it may make things worst..
yes as i say just now.. i still think at times when i look back to my sec sch life.. why do we end up like dat? why cant everything be cleared and be like last time.. ?
but i noe too.. if im still ly 3 yrs ago.. asking n asking.. it might make things between the frenship worst.. we may end up not toking to each other.. so im grateful... at least i noe now we r frenz.. n quite gd frenz too... as for the future... who noes, better?hee.. well... honestly... let it be natually ba...

now the next thing i wan do is ........ well wait til i settle 1st.. but i hope to settle it soon...!! coz i thing it do bothers me....

see ya guys ard here.. hopefully soon?? hahaz... hope there are stuff for me to blog 1st n provided im not lazy!!!

its HK time!!!

2005-04-18T05:24:00.000+08:00

well well.. i really almost forgotten i have got a blog.. haha.. sounds stupid.. but well.. ya.. i realli almost forgotten.. i think since i started this blog... this is the 1st time that i took ly 10 daes later to blog again... but well after todae.. i will taken even longer to blog again.. coz i wun be in spore.. haha... back oni in earli may... will be in HK.. finally!!! time for me to enjoy... and i guess based on my character.. i will relax and be too lazy to blog when im back.. so it will take quite long til my next post...

actually i guess probably bcoz i have been slacking for the past wk.. doing nuthin and tt's y i also have nuthin to blog and totally forgotten tt i have got a blog.. geez.. for the past wk.. other than tues.. go out meet shan dinner.. a few hrs.. and wed just out to collect photos.. n thu.. out to trim hair.. as in realli just trim.. so not much diff.. den go out.. other den tt.. i think most of the time im at hm? geezz.. dun wan go out as dun wan waste money err.. boring lifestyle i guess..

but it wun be so for the coming 2 wks.. will be enjoying.. yipeezzzzz!! im consider independent.. can look after myself ba.. mum went to aust last yr.. home alone 3 wks.. can tahan.. n b4 tt she went hol for a month.. i oso went thru.. but well now overseas for 2 wks.. wonder will i home sick?? hahaz.. will i miss my bed? oh.. not forgetting my dog.. fawnie.... but well i realli have been looking forward to this dae le.. in less den 12 hrs time.. i will be on the plan.. n in ard 13 hrs+ i will be in HK.. oh.. n i probably will b going guangzhou n shenzhen too..well.. well.. time to switch to enjoy mode.. whether i will be hmsick.. eh.. let u guys noe when im back.. haha..
another thing.. actually this trip is a very impt one.. sort of determine wad i shld do.. which path to take after this whole trip.. as in after this trip.. i have to have plans le.. cant be so slack le.. have been slacking too much...

well guys.. i gtg le..time to slp le.. see ya guys in 2 wks + time... god bless!!!

really sinful..

2005-04-09T04:50:00.000+08:00

agrhhh.......blogger was down in the afternoon.. agrhhhhhhh... i actually blogged le.. den when i click onb publish post.. it was down.. after tt.. try to re-login.. but it was down.. oni came in to check now.. and this time round.. not fortunate enuff.. my post is not saved... need re-blog...

well... lazy to blog back ard the same stuff as i blog ard 12 hrs ago.. coz tt was quite a long one..well basically.. these few daes.. i nvr do anything much.. oni wed.. the thing to rem on tt dae.. was yp.. lynn n i were very drenched from the heavy rain.. hahaz.. was quite fun to me actually.. reminded me the lower sec sch days.. whereby b4 sch.. huiwen n i played in the rain.. and got really drenched b4 the lessons.. but it was fun.. i mean.. i guess.. not many pple will do tt haha? pretty memorable though.. so wed being drenched was cool.. oso got me off thinking into stuffz too.. which was at tt time.. i really need one..

and thu.. n yest.. as in fri..... basically stay at hm for 2 whole days.. eh.. wait.. for fri.. lynn..managed to drag me out for dinner.. but just at jec... ate pizza AGAIN..did i mentioned tt tues.. i order pizza home delivery?? well.. i must say.. lately.. im realli sinful.. n pple.. im realli serious tt i think i put on weight.. *oopz* n i think i no need tt.. geez.. time to stop eating too much le.. but im realli at the peak season of my 'piggy' period.. n i need help... to STOP... geeeeez

Photo taken on my bday

2005-04-05T02:23:00.000+08:00

Sisters (from left-right): shan (lee shan/rayne), yinmei (apple), yi (manyi/june) and myself (adeline).

Photo(1) taken on my bday

2005-04-05T02:17:00.000+08:00

5 of us at ktv (from left-right): shan (lee shan/rayne), yinmei (apple), myself (adeline), yanping (apple) and lynn (weibing).

Thanks everyone... What's next??

2005-04-05T01:23:00.000+08:00

sun is over le.. officially 20 le.. ha.. even though i wanted to deny tt im 20 at apr3rd midnight until 818am in the morning (time i was born) then im officially 20.. but well.. now.. there is no way to deny le..lao le means lao le.. a fact i have to face eventually..
anyway..i would like to thanks all my frenz for wishing me happy birthday.. thanks alot.. ha.. actually im just a person happy enuff to have quite alot of frenz wishing me happy bdae which is realli enuff for me le.. i oso would like to thanks the frenz for spending bdae with me - shan, ym, yp, yi n lynn... though lynn in e end nvr go for dinner.. geez.. she furnie lor.. her mum tt dae chinese bdae.. she tt dae den noe.. well anyway.. thanks alot all my frenz.. appreciate lotz... n lurve ya pple...!!!

with the fact that im 20 le.. im even more worried.. yeah.. like wad esther had blog.. its great to have the break.. but well.. wad's next is something that im worried.. as the more days pass by, i felt lost.. i mean REALLI lost..n the feeling of emptiness.. aiz... i know wad i want to do.. but wad r the chances that i will be able to get what i want to do?? seriously.. if i cant get wad i feel like doing.. i will be lost le... as in realli dunno wad to do by den..coz tt is the oni thing in mind i look forward to doing or want to do... at least for now... or shld i sae it had be in my mind for quite some time too le.. til now..?? yes.. uncertainty... the word esther say/use.. also applies to me too.. i believe god has a way for me too.. but can i hope that is the way god had set for me is also the thing i wish to do? well i really hope so but i will let god to guide and lead me..

well.. may god bless all of us.. to find the things we want to do next or the aim in our life... esp for pple out there who feels the same way as me.... and i think esther too..? (after reading her blog)

My LAST day as a 19 or -teen

2005-04-02T23:25:00.000+08:00

today is my last day as a 19 or -teen (i mean even though we are consider as adults long ago but nineteen.. well there is still a 'teen' word there)

so anyway.. being 19 for the last day, how did i spent it?? hahaz.. it was just a normal day i guess... but coz it was my last day as a 19/teen.. i dun wan to stay at hm.. so i meet yp after her music todae..did try to get lynn the day b4.. but stupid la.. she too lazy.. :P..well as it is my last dae as a 19/teen, let me do a detailed starting from the part i woke up.. geezz
well.. todae.. i slept in the morning.. meaning yest night i no sleep.. whole day stay up.. watch vcd.. (i guess everything is finally over so i jus dun wan sleep or mayb i jus make use to the fullest for my teen life?) haha.. well actually i think is more of the former than the latter..

okie.. so i slept in the morning..9+ am woke up at 2+pm.. den supposed to meet yp at 345pm opp far east plaza.. need acc her to repair her watch.. but think in the end.. i was late for like half hr.. so yp went to repair the watch herself.. n we reach.. wanted to have something fromthe HK dessert shop 'Xu Liu Shan' but it was too ex.. n i guess.. i haven eaten anything for the day.. n yp did not have lunch so we went to have mos burger...while eating.. we were chatting on very general topics i guess.. of coz.. definitely including on our so called future plans.. or mayb i shld sae the plan for now.. for me study or work? for her study where...

after mos.. we really walk ard rather aimlessly? haha.. coz we can sae is nvr sae todae will shop.. but well.. we went to wisma den taka though.. reach taka basement .. yp want see if her klassmate working todae.. so we went to haagen dazs (her fren work there) .. well.. she called her fren and got to know he oni start work at six.. well n dunno why.. i just eaten mos.. n i felt piggy so soon.. tt i feel like buying some stuff to bite.. and in the end i got 3 sushi and kinder buen(sorry i dunno how to spell) but well.. i oni ate the 3 sushi 1st though.. anyway.. yp oni got sweets.. so pple.. see ade is SO piggy n SO sinful.. n after we pay.. i still buy BBT somemore.. den we were trying to find those seats near the escalator so i can eat my sushi... but well.. in the end.. stand ard somewhere and have dem eaten instead..

after which.. we went to find yp klassmate again.. yp chatted with him.. while shan call me about the plans for tmr... well we settle on church and lunch.. four of us.. shan..ym..yi n i... den after lunch at 2.. ktv.. shan..ym..yp..lynn..n i... til 7 probably..and after which dinner. yi.. had to leave earli as she having exams on mon n tues.. as much as im disappointed.. but well.. i understand the feeling to pia for exams.. those stress etc.. so well..

okie so anyway.. after finding yp's classmate.. we went hm... well.. i guess it sounds boring.. oh i definitely dun mean going out with yp is boring..but i think todae we were rather aimless ba.. but is me who drag yp to acc me..i just dun wan spend my LAST day as a 19/teen at home.. as i told yp.. i want to breathe the air outside.. n not the one at hm for todae..

well.. turning 20 in like 35min.. oh my gosh..

hey hey.. but hor.. i was actually born at 818am.. so actually i still have like 8hrs 43 min before i realli turn 20 lehz..:P (i jus dun wan to turn 20 yet i guess... it is so OLD...!!!)

p.s: lina is gonna sae me.. haha.. on this old n 20 topic again.. :P